I'm feeling good

What keeps you sane.

[Granted that I can't be normal, anyway]

And I'm feeling good.

[Photo: Star Wars Rebellion organizer by @thedicetroyers]

The edge

Anakin [] plunged into the droid ranks with his lightsaber. []

There was nothing in his mind beyond his troops and that only he could save them.

Save; he did so much saving now but it would never be enough to make him whole.

He felt his lightsaber blade slice through metal—there was always a slight kick on contact, like a drill hitting a hard spot—but he craved more. He craved destruction, not to prove to himself that he had such huge power, but simply to hold the chaos at bay.

*I didn’t save my mother.*

He had the strength and skill to wipe out legions of droids, but he hadn’t used it for the person who mattered most.

Anakin tore into droid after droid, killing on upstroke and downstroke, spinning to take out droids rushing him from behind, rolling to scythe his way through their legs. Hot hydraulic fluid spattered on his face like blood.

*Why didn’t I go back for my mother, when I could have done this, and this, and this?*

As the surge of Force power almost squeezed the air from his lungs in his all-out effort to crush the next rank of droids, he felt suddenly light-headed, and in that second’s pause he became aware of troopers fighting furiously to his right—smashing metal skulls with butts of rifles, ramming vibroblades into weak points—but he couldn’t see Ahsoka. []

He was never going to lose someone he cared about again. []

*You can’t think those things. You’re a Jedi.*

*But I can. And I do.*

[From "The Clone Wars" by Karen Traviss]

~

I am always amazed by how the novelization of the 2008 animated movie always hits the right spots.

Anakin is so human there.

Strong and, yet, fragile.

Always at the edge.

Ready to break.

But war is relentless.

And fighting is instinctual.

No time to think?

To regret?

And, still, suddenly.

Those excruciating moments, alone in his own head.

Lost in recurring gotos and what-ifs.

[Photo: utterly stunning pin by @ritarussiandoll_pins. Art by osiripengin]

Inked

“This is Uingali,” the spokesman said as the Pacc stopped in front of Thrawn. “He has something he wishes to give you.”

For a moment Uingali stood motionless. Then, with clear reluctance, he lifted both hands in front of him, one hand tugging at the fingers of the other. A moment later he’d slid a double ring off two of the fingers, the twin circlets connected by a short, flexible mesh. Another moment of hesitation, and he held the double ring toward Thrawn. “Uingali foar Marocsaa,” he said.

“The double ring is a prized heirloom of the Marocsaa subclan,” the spokesman said quietly. “Uingali wishes you to take it and add it to your artwork, that the subclan and the Marocsaa people will not be forgotten.”

For the first time since Thalias had met him, Thrawn seemed genuinely surprised. He looked at Uingali, then at the rings, then at Uingali again. Then, he held out his hand, palm upward. “Thank you,” he said. “I will guard it in a place of honor.” Uingali lowered his head in a bow as he placed the double ring in Thrawn’s hand. He straightened up, turned, and walked back toward the other Paccosh. []

Thalias peered at the double ring in Thrawn’s palm. It was made of a silvery metal, with a series of curved arcs embossed on the base. A cluster of what looked like small snakes rose from the center of the arcs, flanked by two much larger snakes that curved up and around, crossing each other once and ending with their heads and open mouths pointed defiantly upward.

~

I never was an "Empire gal."

[And I am still not now]

So, marking myself with something too "imperial" was never an option.

But I wanted to celebrate how Thrawn changed my life.

How he was me, and I was him, as I tried to express many times in these past couple of years.

[If you have the time, check at least my posts on Feb 24, and Apr 22, 2021, and Feb 24, 2022 - linked in my stories today]

And then, suddenly, the Marocsaa crest.

Mr. Zahn coding a simple "Rebels" artistic choice as the emblem of everything Thrawn represents.

Loyalty, respect, friendship, sacrifice, care, selflessness, admiration, trust, love.

And I am proud to have it inked on me.

[Photo: tattoo by @joelytattoos]

Loyalties

For a long moment, the Emperor gazed into those glowing red eyes.

Thrawn was a useful and formidable servant. But he would make an equally formidable enemy. And a servant with divided loyalties was no servant at all.

There was an even more intriguing question, however. If the Chiss also recognized that fact, and if Thrawn was indeed loyal to the Empire instead of the Ascendancy, would his own people decide he was a potential threat to them? If so, would they move to eliminate that threat?

And what of the Grysks? Lord Vader had dismissed them as a distant threat, one that could be ignored for the present. But he’d been unable to hide the fact that they were a threat.

Perhaps Thrawn was pointing in the right direction.

Perhaps an alliance between the Empire and the Ascendancy was what the future held. With himself, the Emperor, in command of both. It was an intriguing thought. Perhaps Thrawn could be made an even more valuable servant.

If he committed treason against the Empire, he would surely die.

If he was loyal to the Empire, perhaps he could be persuaded or manipulated into treason against the Ascendancy.

~

Thrawn’s expression hardened, and for that single awful moment Qilori thought he’d made the final mistake of his life. “Let me explain something, Qilori of Uandualon,” the Chiss said softly. “My job—the sole reason for my existence—is to defend the Chiss Ascendancy and protect my people. I will do whatever is necessary to achieve that goal, and I will allow nothing and no one to stand in my way. Do you understand?”

With a supreme effort Qilori kept his winglets motionless. “Yes,” he said.

“Good.” Thrawn held his gaze another moment, then inclined his head. “And now I believe it’s time we both returned to our appointed tasks.”

~

For those in the fandom who claim that Thrawn would be more loyal to the Empire.

[NO, loves, he wouldn't]

[Photo: re-stock of a beautiful LaylayMaru (Etsy) pin, Grand Admiral pearl variant]

My happy straw

Catastrophic fall

In other news.

I was dusting my JayVik shelf, and my lovely Funko Pop fell precisely, in a house full of carpet, on the base of a lamp, disintegrating his cane in a way that I can barely believe it's possible.

So I had to redo it completely.

A knight of the Jedi Order

"You will die, and your apprentice will become a servant of evil."

"What are you talking about?"

"The dark side. It pulls at him; it calls to him. Eventually, he will be consumed by it. Stand aside. The boy must be eliminated before he embraces the darkness."

"I won't let that happen."

"Is this the limit of your knowledge?"

"I learned enough."

"I think not. You will never be strong enough to protect your pupil, and you will perish for your failure. Even now, the servants of the dark side come for your apprentice. You cannot fight forever."

"You're right. I can't protect Ezra forever. Not even from himself. All I can do is what I've done, train him the best I could."

"By the right of the Council, by the will of the Force, Kanan Jarrus, you may rise."

"Wait, what does this mean?"

"It means you are what I once was. A knight of the Jedi Order."

~

Aaaaaand... I cry.

[Yes. This is the actual caption]

[I did not expect to have a Kanan post this week, honestly, but so many of you reached out to me for the beautiful sticker I shared in my story that I wanted to show off the full masterpiece created by Chiara (@khermsart) an Italian artist. This was the first fanart print I bought on Etsy in 2020, just after opening this account]